Discover the 3 Parenting Approaches That Seem Ideal for Raising Happy Children, but Actually Subtly Sabotage Their Future – Parents, Beware!
Do you know anything about the concept of “happy education”?
After a long period of time, people have been complaining about the fact that children are under a lot of pressure, studying and living in stress, chasing after achievements, so a new concept called “happy education” has emerged.
Happy education means that children should play more and enjoy learning instead of being under pressure. Some places apply this concept by reducing academic pressure to allow more time for playing and not ranking academic performance. However, the problem is that when the pressure is lifted, many children become careless because many people misunderstand the concept of happy education. True happy education, according to the original concept by English educator Herbert Spencer, aims not to meet rigid demands but to make children happy and ensure that the learning process is also joyful. Children should constantly learn, but the teaching approach should provide them with joy, stimulate creative learning, and make them enthusiastic about learning. Parents should help their children develop an interest and love for learning, not because of grades, but because of the actual benefits of learning, and make sure this process is not burdensome but filled with joy.
When the concept of happy education spreads, there are still many parents who practice it incorrectly, specifically making three common mistakes that provide short-term happiness to their children but fail to build a foundation for long-term happiness:
Allowing children to avoid studying by focusing on playing
Due to the fear of their children feeling pressured, parents believe that it is more important for children to have fun than to study. However, many children lack awareness of life and prioritize playing, fearing studying and not valuing the path of knowledge. As a result, many children study just to get by and do not aspire for higher education. The consequence is that when they enter the workforce, their professions are not stable, their knowledge is insufficient, and they struggle on their life journey.
To truly make children happy, parents should find ways to ignite their joy in learning, help them understand that learning is valuable, and not let them be afraid of studying. Learning is not everything but it provides a solid foundation. Understanding this, both parents and children will be eager to learn, recognize personal achievements, and have a passion for deepening their knowledge, rather than constantly comparing themselves to others based on grades. Happy education is about creating joy in the learning process, not skipping it for the sake of playing.
Allowing children to do whatever they want
Letting children do whatever they want does not mean that everything they do is right. Children lack a broad vision and experience, so parents cannot let them do whatever they please. Allowing children to be happy means not imposing their own will on them, not scolding them when they don’t listen. However, completely letting them do as they please is not right, as it would be careless parenting. When parents see their children making choices that seem problematic, they should analyze and guide them, closely supervise them, and sometimes allow them to stumble so that they can learn a lesson, rather than letting go completely and saying “do whatever you want”. Letting children be independent means that parents have mastered the art of guiding, not abandoning them.
When children show inappropriate behavior, such as speaking disrespectfully to adults, parents should not scold them, but it does not mean agreeing with them either, as they are still young. In such situations, parents should not scold but rather analyze and teach them that it is wrong… When children accidentally break things, even if unintentional, they should still take responsibility for their actions. We should not “punish” children, but we should not overlook everything because if we do not, they will frequently inadvertently cause more harm.
Allowing children freedom does not mean not monitoring them, but it does not mean that if the children make a mistake, parents should just let it go. Lack of discipline and freedom violates the freedom of others. If children understand their responsibility for their decisions and unintended actions, if they see the mistakes after parents analyze them, they will grow up to be more mature, have a deeper understanding of life, and their own freedom will not violate the freedom of others. This is true freedom. However, if parents completely let their children do whatever they want, then it is not happy education but rather raising wild children.
Parents always respect every decision made by their children
Children need to learn how to make decisions on their own so that they can grow up to be confident and independent. However, if parents see their children making wrong choices and remain silent, it is not reasonable. When children make mistakes in their decisions, parents need to provide guidance and analysis for them to come up with solutions. Parents need to support and evaluate their children’s correct choices and give constructive criticism for wrong choices. Criticism does not mean scolding or harshly criticizing, but rather holding children accountable for their wrong choices, giving them the opportunity to rectify their mistakes instead of parents fixing them.
Happy education is a great concept for children to develop both knowledge and spirit in a joyful way. Happy education means removing external achievements, respecting children, but not underestimating the importance of learning. Parents need to respect their children but also guide them to understand their personal freedom and respect the freedom of others. Parents need to help children take responsibility for their decisions and unintentional actions. Children who understand their mistakes and their parents’ analysis will grow up to have a more profound understanding of life and have a solid sense of their own freedom without violating the freedom of others. Therefore, do not let your children enjoy the present but lack a foundation for the future.
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